Thursday, April 24, 2014

The Only Creation Myth With a Male God, I’m Going to Believe in….

Maitani - Creation of Eve, from the facade of the Orvieto Cathedral
When God finished creating Eve, he looked down at his work and smiled.

“Damn. I am really doing some fine creating today. Look at those lumps and bumps. The curve is the best shape I ever made, and I've used it to maximum effect today.  I am a genius. That is some sweet sugar right there.”

God glanced at Adam and frowned. “He’s all lines and angles. Not my best work. A bit primitive.”  God thought a bit. “Well, Why should I give her to him? He’s just a pale stinking shadow of me.” God flicked Adam into the cosmos and woke Eve. He said, “Come to the arms of your creator.  I gave you life, now let me show you how to live.”

As Adam hurtled through the stars, a Goddess caught him in her baseball glove. She saw that he was good and decided to keep him and make much use of him.


From the "Gospel of Gender Equality."